Barenaked Ladies Miscellaneous Words & Music By Steven Page Words & music by ed robertson A friend brought me flowers, she said they were lilacs But i've never been good with plants Her next presentation, a new dictionary She'd circled the word "romance" So enthusiastic, a little bit drastic I shaved her name in my head And as she beheld it, she said i misspelled it; Need more be said! Chorus: These apples are delicious! "As a matter of fact they are," she said Can all this fruit be free? She wrote me a letter as big as a phonebook I've never been big on mail I sent her a postcard from somewhere near lethebridge And wondered if it still went by rail I've never been frightened of being enlightened But some things can go too far Though sometimes i stammer and mix up my grammar, You get what my meanings are Chorus I'm not trying to sing a love song -- i'm trying to sing in tune. I know i am sometimes headstrong Falling love, catching fire -- i want to be consumed Wondering will i ever tire, will i ever tire! Chorus