Dear Pop,
The fear stopped me from saying this before,
But I'm grown up.
So, I'mma lay it on the floor.
It's time to own up,
You're pumping your liver with liquor.
I shiver.
You're getting sicker.
Swallowing liquor.
Slivers.
Drowning in whiskey rivers.
For ten years,
I let it fly.
But wings clip,
Flight risk.
Can't live to watch you die like this.
And I remember when I was kid,
Looking for my dad.
But all day he's busy.
7 P.M. hits,
With the whiskey on your plus.
From a small boy dizzy,
Got the fam sayin', "Who is he?"
Then the hour glass cracked.
Matched with the sour man's Jack.
How is that trapped, dad?
Are you on your last lap?
Trying to tap dance between crack and a flask?
I remember when we packed in that van down to Florida.
Mom said you was a goner.
Call the coroner.
She said you loved that whore more than her.
I sat stirred.
Like what the fuck is Lady Luck provin'?
You moved in,
With that 86 proof man.
Actually mixing your solution.
That battery of my disillusion.
And I know this is useless,
So be it with the rest.
But I had to get it off my head,
And out of my chest.
And I'm watching you washing it down.
Watching you drown.
Lost in the now,
Lost in the then.
Trying to find a zen with a frostbitten frown.
Every night you left your son behind the hearse,
But instead of the hurt
I learned how to move up.
Sky wise,
Nowadays I stop by.
I see the same eyes,
Rolled back in your eyelids passed out.
Man down.
I'm a man screamin' silent in this glasshouse.
I didn't want to make a sound because I'm that proud.
But I'm tryin' to be a man.
Plus tryin' to find my dad some land to land.
Because he's drowning in
Jack Dan quicksand.
Doin' all he can
To keep the fam together.
Plus stand the weather.
Dad, I understand the pressure.
Tryin' to the pay the bills
Plus kill life's ills.
Out of that fraction,
None of that mattered.
We needed a role model,
Not a robot who holds bottles.
Just to chase the day,
I hate to see you waste away.
Your face decays and fades to gray.
But damn dad,
You're the greatest man I know when you're sober.
But I've watched you transform into a king cobra,
Once that drink soak up in your blood.
And I'm proud to be your son,
But I can't act passive.
Can't stand back.
Or laugh at it.
The sad fact is that we all addicts.
You got one wife who's heart's broken.
Two sons pot smokin'.
One daughter out rollin'.
Four people that knew you before you got loaded.
It might be a lost notion, but it's time to stop smokin'.
You gotta a bottle of Jack in a bleeding hand.
It's osmosis through a decent man.
You used to read it dad,
'Hop On Pop',
Now you're lost on scotch.
Sad dad,
Bad had.
My last gasp,
But I'm through with it.
I just wish that you could quit.
It's a bad taste,
And I'm watching you washing it down.
Watching you drown.
Lost in the now,
Lost in the then.
Trying to find a zen with a frostbitten frown.
See it's a bad taste,
And I'm watching you washing it down.
Watching you drown.
Lost in the now,
Lost in the then.
Trying to find a zen with a frostbitten frown.