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The movie starts
"Sweet Emotion"'s playing in the background
Kids are smoking weed with slater
Man he's such a class clown
All the cars are full of beer, Bacardi and Liquor
Because tonight there is a giant house party at Pickford's
It's the last day of school
Slater is trippin'
Tony had a weird dream
And tells mike he should listen
In his dream he had a naked girl her boobies were decent
But then the naked body's head belonged to Abraham Lincoln
Whoah
Don gives Randal Pink a pledge sheet for football that says
He can't do drugs while Benny's making a paddle
Jodi begs the guys not to hurt her brother Mitch Kramer
But they still plan to damn they're such assholes
They're breaking it down, for the football coach
"You have to use substance?
Randal pink you better be giving yourself an attitude adjustment."
So they drive up to the middle school to make a big announcement
Mitchy, Mitchy, Mitchy do not run don't think about it
Mitch asks the teacher if they can escape through the back
"50 going on a mission, 25 ain't coming back,"
School is over but they're getting chased like fuck it lets be out
Carl's mom pulls out a gun, "But there's ruffians about,"
(Air raid you freshman bitches!)
They're smoking weed in Pickford's room
The beer man brought the kegs too soon
The party's cancelled, ruining the plans that were in store
Cause if you go to Pickford's house and knock his dad answers the door
Mitch is at his game he's pitching' and he's terrified
Oh holy shit he looks up in the bleachers and right there's the guys
They catch him and then end him over beat him 'til his canny's pink
Now he can hardly walk and so he gets a ride from Randy Pink
They pick him up later like he's a foolish little kid
"You got a joint?" "No i don't," "Well it'd be cooler if you did."
Alright, alright, alright, theres Wooderson he's such a crazy fool
They go to the emporium to meet some girls and play some pool
You leave the dance, you can't come back
But fuck it those kids didn't care
They wanna walk around a bit but Herschfelder was "Gettin' there."
Now they're getting chased and they get liked by O'Bannon
Wee, Wee, Wee squeal like a pig oh my god they can't stand him
Now they're breaking mailboxes with cans that's meant for trash
Get a gun pulled on em "fuck this old man, Pickford hit the gas!"
They get revenge on O'Bannon, with Hardy laughter dude scours
Wodderson plotted a beerbst, awesome party at the moon tower!
President George Washington was not a homosapien
Mitch and Julie hit it off, theyre prolly gonna get it on
The beer is flowin nicely then abruptly everything went wrong
Smells like someone's smokin reefer! i'm the one thats smokin reefer
Push him, sucker punch him, oopsie daisies put him in the sleeper
Dominant alpha male mothafucker you fuckin disgust me i hate your guts
He's kickin his ass hes punchin and kickin and killin him til they break it up
God damn it, he's lucky that he's still alive
Stupid mothafucka had to ruin shit and kill the vibe
The party's over, keg is tapped, it's get up in the car time
Lets go smoke a joint right on the 50 fuckin yard line!
Break down! giggling! party in the hot night!
Mustve been too loud or something theres a fuckin cop light
Cops are talkin shit like they can smell beer and smell smoke
Randy Floyd is gettin high well wait til i go tell coach!
Coach comes, mad as hell, Randy Pink, let's speak
Ditch your loser friends right now and sign your freakin pledge sheet
Sorry coach I got a speech for you it goes like this
Ya see I might play football in the fall but nope i won't sign this, peace!
Mitch and Julie making out until the sun rise
Mama grabs him by the ear you're off the hook this one time
Mitchell are you drunk right now? heck no mom
Happy end Mitch Kramer goes to sleep with headphones on
Dazed and Confused