Fat cats holding nothing back I'm on the fast track to a heart attack Losing my fucking mind Trying to keep up with the times Broke as hell, they won't let me forget I'm facing 20 more years of student debt Thank god I got that degree Ain't doing dick for me All I wanted was a bed of roses My sorry ass got thorns Keeping up with the Joneses You got problems with your second house Well I got problems with my bank account You're trying to renovate I need a sixth roommate I ain't bitching and moaning I'm just falling behind Keeping up with the Joneses I made my cell phone and car payment Then I went and spent all my food budget On a new tattoo But dammit, it looks cool My grandma's friends are staring down their noses But we all have our own way Of keeping up with the Joneses Ain't that the way life goes, yeah 'Til the day we die We're keeping up with the Joneses