Okay This is a song that uhh There's a lot of Christmas songs out there and uhh Not too many Chanukah songs So uhh I wrote a song for all those nice little Jewish kids who don't get to hear any Chanukah songs Here we go! Put on your yarmulke Here comes Chanukah So much funukkah To celebrate Chanukah Hanukkah is the Festival of Lights Instead of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights! When you feel like the only kid in town Without a Christmas tree Here's a list of people who are Jewish Just like you and me David Lee Roth lights the Menorah So do James Caan, Kirk Douglas and the late Dina Shore-ah Guess who eats together at the Carnegie Deli? Bowzer from Sha Na Na and Arthur Fonzerelli Paul Newman's half Jewish, Goldie Hawn's half too Put them together, what a fine looking Jew! You don't need "Deck the Halls" or "Jingle Bell Rock" 'Cause you can spin a dreidel with Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock (both Jewish!) Put on your yarmulke It's time for Chanukah The owner of the Seattle Supersonic-ahs Celebrates Chanukah O.J. Simpson: not a Jew But guess who is? Hall-of-famer Rod Carew (he converted) We got Ann Landers and her sister Dear Abby Harrison Ford's a quarter Jewish, not too shabby! Some people think that Ebenezer Scrooge is Well, he's not, but guess who is? All Three Stooges! So many Jews are in showbiz Tom Cruise isn't, but I heard his agent is Tell your friend Veronica It's time you celebrate Chanukah I hope I get a harmonica On this lovely, lovely Chanukah So drink your gin and tonic-ah And smoke your marijuani-kkah If you really, really wanna-kkha Have a happy, happy, happy, happy Chanukah Happy Chanukah!