To my fellow toxic man, I completely understand
What it's like to always feel the need to have the upper hand
And to blame your girl for everything that you're doing wrong
Pushing her away but not enough to where she's moving on
You just wanna see how far you can take it
She has some confidence but you know that you can break it
Draining all the love inside her heart until it's truly vacant
She only stays 'cause she prays for you
Knowing that you're too complacent
You're too impatient and don't wanna do that inner work
You'll just tell her that you did your best but that it didn't work
She's become an introvert from all the shit you did to her
Only when you think about those nights does it begin to hurt
You're somebody that you hate to be
Always busy chasing things
That you lost yourself along the way it seems
Remember when your parents acted out and they screamed
Well you're repeating the cycle doing the same thing
And that's what happens when your family's dysfunctional
And love was rarely there but the fights were always punctual
So the love you felt at home, was all that you've ever known
But there's a whole other side to it that you've never known
Love is not a list of rules that are set in stone
That you give your girlfriend to follow when she's left alone
I know what it's like to wanna have complete control
Fuckin' blacking out and letting all that anger eat your soul
Having every single partner always thinking that you're ruthless
And you don't have excuses you just don't know why you do this
But looking back insecurities is what it was
I felt that if she left, it would mean I'm not enough
But I know that it's the demons in my head I need to slaughter
Not anybody else, it's myself I need to conquer
And I had an ephinany that left me truly bothered
I yell just like my father
And in that very moment I realized I need to change me
'Cause I don't wanna be the fuckin' man who's always angry
Accusing her of cheating because I'm the one who cheated
And saying that I love her but I make her feel defeated
See I wanted to learn how to show her she was needed
And love her every damn day, not just when it's convenient
And I'mma tell you something that I wish somebody said to me
Not being a controlling man, will actually set you free
So fight your demons I mean every single one
For the times they held you back and never let you see the sun
Because it's all up to you who you potentially become
And by hearing this you've already mentally begun
I am proof you can be a better version of yourself
You just gotta put the work in and start searchin' in yourself
And it's not gonna be easy, but you know what you need to do
To my fellow toxic man, I believe in you