The callus left by years of steady self-destruction Has finally dried and cracked like thinnest clay The irritation pours out from repression These are the things I thought I threw away Strange how you cannot change when you want But see that I am no chameleon here So all of this comes back to who I was Before the wind had blown away my fear No matter what you do to avoid them Your past and problems will not wander off And like a boulder on the path to self-corruption The light between the cracks is not enough You call unto the walls that you construed The walls that break my shattered body's fall You cannot undermine what I am feeling The only thing I want is to feel nothing at all Digging in your lithosphere Why aren't all the answers here? Physical life is a trap I can make you disappear The scar of harsh rejection opens wide It's been so long and here is comfort cold The ones who summon noble introspection Are now like famished wolves with flesh to hold And only once did everything subside Perhaps it was my one and only taste Of life through eyes of nobody defined Pull more and more till winter comes and I have been erased And so am I, so here am I