My back starting to hurt me I'm close to 30 Fall in love but can't stay in it I'm gettin worried WellHigh as fuck dealing with all the emotions I buried Never been too much in a hurry But I can see how some of my decisions might hurt me I been at it for minute verified without a check I been hitting goals while accumulating debt Adding to my stress Still give it my best Paint and sip some tea while reminiscing my wins When I shut it down you best come up with my ends Stay prayed up as I repent my sins God tired of my ass ima do it again If you want it you can own it but you gotta stay focused Don't be the last to grab a glass and we just finished up toasting I don't take pics, I'm selfish and I hate sharing moments Moms think my smile fucked up but my teeth is just golden Wild times when the wild times are over Bet I got the scarves to prove it Don't you worry bout my heart If you were here then you knew it On the music tip I'm different But I never could prove it To busy building tables for us I missed out on the music No lie Im gettin old And im prolly lil jaded now Nip it in the bud Let 'em know that I ain't playin now Vetted fo she thirty That's a different kinda lady now Know they gone respect it When you show em you can hold it down And I always did Before I shoulda been I always been a grown ass kid Ask t We was doin always grown ass shit It's all on me? Ight cool How I always lived Wasn't til now I understand how fucked up alla that is It birthed overachieving, hyper independent, overreacting, hyper analytical, gangsta I hope one day y'all find a way to thank her But I know that you won't Cuz to do that you'd have to see her And I know that you don't My doubt inbedded cuz I seen all of this shit. My mom The fakest love The worship and the curse come from the same tongue Created tribe but I grow more from all the days I'm alone Found my purpose on a nights I wondered why I was born Trauma took a lotta of memories no lie that shit gone Or maybe I'm just gettin old it's time to leave em alone Guess I'll pave the way now I'm the elder on the porch affirmin all the crooked smiles I'm the aunty puttin Applecider in ya teas now Swearin onions on ya feet gone always get that fever down Damn my gma would be proud Got my mama trippin out Time repeats itself and so do we I think I get it now But it's beautiful So I find wisdom in my wrinkles And I'll see good in the greys At least I made it here to see this day