I am afraid
I fear being alone, growing old, settling down
And it may sound selfish but if we're being honest,
I'm afraid of not getting what I want
But I also fear the fact that I don't always know what I want
I'm afraid of not giving myself to God
I'm afraid of not giving myself to my wife
I'm afraid of being consumed by bitterness and cynicism
And not holding to my innocence
Not pushing myself, not changing myself, but I'm also afraid of change
I'm afraid of becoming something I
May hate or dying alone a boring person
I fear being a father; repeating my father's mistakes
I fear having children that grow old to resent me
I fear having children at all, but I also fear dying without them.
I fear losing my creativity, my friends and my family
Over this I lose sleep every night a little more
Over this I lose sleep every night a little more