At words poetic, I'm so pathetic That I always have found it best, Instead of getting 'em off my chest, To let 'em rest unexpressed, I hate parading my serenading As I'll probably miss a bar, But if this ditty is not so pretty At least it'll tell you How great you are. You're the top! You're the Colosseum. You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum. You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss You're Haley's comet, A Shakespeare's sonnet, You're Mickey Mouse. You're the Nile, You're the Tower of Pisa, You're the smile on the Mona Lisa I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop, But if, baby, I'm the bottom you're the top! You're the top! You're Mahatma Gandhi. You're the top! You're Napoleon Brandy. You're the purple light Of a summer night in Spain, You're the National Gallery You're Oprah's salary, You're John Coltrane. You're supreme, You're a turkey dinner, You're the dream of a lotto winner I'm a toy balloon that's fated soon to pop But if, baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top! But if, baby, I'm the bottom... ...You're the top!