What is that velvet slumber shattering shriek
How can one bird make so much nois with its beak
The song it's plucking on the harp of my nerves
Is sucking all my diplomatic reserves
Oh, I can't sleep
Don't tell me I need vitamins or
Minerals or other things that don't come cheap
Oh, I can't sleep
I look as if a feathered freak has kept me
From my dreams all week, and I can't sleep
I can't sleep, I can't sleep, I can't sleep
What is this hurricane afflicting my sheet
I spent an hour laying it out flat and neat
Now it's twisting a tornado down my legs to my feet
Seems like a storm is brewing, and I'm stewing in heat
Oh, I can't sleep
Don't tell me that I need to brew
Some tea from Kathmandu that tastes of rotten sheep
Oh, I can't sleep
I look as if an evil gale has spun
My sheet into a tail, and I can't sleep
I can't sleep, I can't sleep, I can't sleep
What are these pricklings popping up in my head
Come all ye sicklings, come and join me in bed
These grains of madness, round my skull rattling
Like the seeds in the maraca of a cannibal king
Oh, I can't sleep
Don't tell me I need yoga,
Cos I'll dislocate my shoulder, end up in a heap
Oh, I can't sleep
I look as if some notions have
Accorded me commotions, and I can't sleep
I can't sleep, I can't sleep, I can't sleep
Naughty Bird, it goes cheepy, cheepy
Gusty sheet, it goes creepy, creepy
Crazy thoughts, they go leapy, leapy
Broken man, he goes weepy weepy