Well theres a long neck on my left and theres some long legs on my right
And i'm too far gone to know which way to fall
If i can't put some words together, and get a couple cross my lips
Well that blonde is gonna leave before last call
And theres a tiny little waylon that keeps singin' in my ear
Tellin me there ain't no point in lookin' back
I put that bottle to my lips, count to ten and close my eyes
One more friday night, i'm sittin' here committin', beer-i-cide
Well there's a biker in the corner, who thinks i stole his girl
And man i swear he's itchin' for a fight
If this bar would just stop spinnin', like some gin soaked tilt a whirl
I'd show him who's the big dog here tonight
Theres a tiny little johnny tellin' me to walk the line
Tiny waylons yellin' "hit him from behind"
I put that bottle to my lips before i follow him outside
And its got the whole bar bettin', im comittin, beer-i-cide
Instrumental
Well now i guess i should be leavin' cause theyre turnin' off the lights
And my eyes gone down enough, so i can see
I might stumble home a broken man, but there's one ray of hope
That six pack waitin' in the fridge for me
Now hank sr's on my shoulder, singin "bless your cheatin heart"
Meanwhile johnny's tellin' waylon "told you so"
I take that bottle from my lips, to kiss my next ex-wife goodbye
I've used all the rope she's given', im comittin', beer-i-cide
And i really will be sorry least until tomorrow night
When once more i'll be here tomorrow sittin', still comittin' beer-i-cide