I am on a quest For my father's sacred sword Unparalleled in craftsmanship in all the land The blade, the blade! Sharper than a dragon's fangs Cuts through foes like a big knife through a ham All I ever wanted was to fill his giant shoes I'll retrieve his sacred blade, there's no way that I could lose! ...Wait, what? What? What do you mean? You're telling me he stole it from a guy when he wasn't looking? What? What do you mean? You're telling me my father was a lousy good-for-nothing? No! I don't believe you! Foul demon begone So you're telling me That he stole a sword to impress the ladies? And - furthermore That he was a no good crook who would steal from a baby? No! I don't believe you! Lying beast begone! I am on a quest for my father's sacred blade I know it's so strong and so cool People lie and besmirch my father's name - Bronkius Bonehead The Village Fool (God rest his soul)