Hey, hey Women are going mad today Hey, hey Fellas are just as bad, I'll say! Go anywhere Just stand and stare You'll say they're bugs When you look at the clothes they wear Masculine women, feminine men Which is the rooster, which is the hen? It's hard to tell 'em apart today And say Sister is busy learning to shave Brother just loves his permanent wave It's hard to tell 'em apart today Hey, hey! Girls were girls and boys were boys When I was a tot Now we don't know who is who Or even what's what! Knickers and trousers, baggy and wide Nobody knows who's walking inside! Those masculine women and feminine men Stop, look, listen and you'll agree with me Things are not what they used to be, you'll see You say hello to Uncle Joe Then look again, and you'll find it's your Auntie Flo! Masculine women, feminine men Which is the rooster, which is the hen? It's hard to tell 'em apart today! And say Why, auntie is smoking, rolling her own Uncle is always buying cologne It's hard to tell 'em apart today Hey, hey You go into give your girl a kiss in the hall But instead you find you're kissing her brother Paul! Ma's got a sweater up to her chin; Papa's got a girdle holding him in Those masculine women and feminine men! Now, wifey is playing billiards and pool Hubby is dressing the kiddies for school It's hard to tell 'em apart today Hey, hey Since the Prince of Wales in ladies' dresses was seen What does he intend to be The King or the Queen? Why, grandmother buys those tailor-made clothes; Grandfather tries to smell like a rose Those masculine women and feminine men!