If I got 99 problems You're like 45 of them (yeah) You hit nails in your coffin Like you're a whack-a-mole champion Leave my heart on your table While you took shots from the navel (yeah) Boy, you made me unstable (boy you made me unstable) No, you can't come over And play doctor, doctor, no (yeah) I'm happy like the Joker Since you left this bitch alone It's been so long since I popped open the smiley pills Yeah, I get on so much better without chemicals Since you've been gone My prescription never needs refill You're so bitter, bitter, bitter You're my little serotonin killer (Rest in peace to all my serotonin) Why so serious? You're standing there acting innocent Gaslight like you had no part in it Don't play with fire, not with a crazy bitch (oh, crazy) My therapist don't like you Thinks you should pay the bill So I left you my student loans When I wrote out my will (I hope you enjoy) No, you can't come over And play doctor, doctor, no (no touchy) I'm happy like the Joker Since you left this bitch alone It's been so long since I popped open the smiley pills (my smiley pills) Yeah, I get on so much better without chemicals (chemicals) Since you've been gone My prescription never needs refill (yeah) You're so bitter, bitter, bitter You're my little serotonin killer (Rest in peace to all my serotonin) ♪ No touchy