Nearly once did I pull David Beckham
Instead, he went and copped off with your mate
Nearly once did I defeat temptation
Step on scales, achieve my target weight
Nearly once did I become real famous
Nearly signing autographs on the street
Did the photo sessions, recorded all the songs
Then label dropped us from 800 feet
And that's the reason why we hate "nearly"
As we long for day when someone loves us dearly
We went so close, yes, we did really
We were this far away from love sincerely
♪
Nearly, we were actually the reason
Footballer and popstar would perform
All they really wanted was cuddle and a hug
And an XXL like me to keep me warm
Nearly did I get myself run over
When Kevin Keegan clearly blew a kiss
Nearly did we get beat up by bouncers
When Elton John we caused his train to miss
And that's the reason why we hate "nearly"
As we long for day when someone loves us dearly
We went so close, yes, we did really
We were this far away from love sincerely
♪
If I could sell as many cakes as I eat in this shop
If only, occasionally, I was able to say stop
If only men saw more of me than groove or crooked mop
Then clearly, I could cause some knee to drop
In truth, we sang along to every record
In truth, we went and cheered on every team
Program signed by substitute, ticket stub from gate
Was the nearest that we got to livin' dream
And that's the reason why we hate "nearly"
As we long for day when someone loves us dearly
We went so close, yes, we did really
We were this far away from love sincerely