Let's take a measure of the misery and pain Suffered every second by every sentient being With a brain, with a sensory experience Sufficient to feel terrified, tortured, or furious Subtract the ones who must have done somethin' To justify this kind of comeuppance And what's left is the innocent remainder Poor little lambs and babies in a manger Who's responsible for this calamity? Natural disaster, deaths in the family Tragedy strikes, and the victims react With religion That's a well-known fact Add up the infant mortality, pathogens Infections, violent crimes and cancer deaths And you end up with a "suffering index" And the bigger that is, the bigger religion gets Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Bad things happen to good people Bad things happen, bad things happen Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Any god who could change that But chose not to Is evil Here's a catch-22 to grapple with Religious people tend to be higher in happiness And when tragedy strikes by accident Religion spikes right after it The more dysfunctional a country is The more people turn to faith just to function in it Secular people are less happy than people of faith But secular places are more safe And safe citizens really are happier Compared to where hardship's nastier So the faithful have happier faces Than heathens in places that lack the basics But a heathen living in a safe place can Be better off than somebody praying in a wasteland Which means the more miserable you are The more religious you are overall, FUBAR Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Bad things happen to good people Bad things happen, bad things happen Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Any god who could change that But chose not to, is evil Whenever a devastating tragedy occurs Our instinct is to look for the perpetrator first "Who did that? We're gonna punish somebody Whoever did it is about to get beaten bloody!" But some events have no person behind them People infer the perpetrator is divine then A supernatural agent was testing your faith when He sent those raging tsunami waves in And that's a sticky situation How do you punish a supernatural agent? Logistically quite difficult It's kinda tricky when the target is invisible You can't stay mad at god, that's pointless You're probably better off tryin' to get anointed And that's why Mr. Almighty gets to claim All the credit, and none of the blame Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Bad things happen to good people Bad things happen, bad things happen Bad things happen to good people Good things happen to bad people Any god who could change that But chose not to, is evil