Have you ever seen an idealist with gray hairs on his head? Or successful men who keep in touch with unsuccessful friends? You only think you did And I could've sworn I saw it too But as it turns out It was just a clever ad for cigarettes Cause if it isn't making dollars Then it isn't making sense If you aren't moving units Then you're not worth the expense If you really want to make it You had best remember this: If it isn't penetration Then it isn't worth a kiss And we're so sorry sir, but you did not quite make the cut this time And we'd appreciate it if you cleared your stuff all out by five Don't take it personal Everyone knows you did your best If it makes it easier you should look at it from our perspective end Cause if it isn't making dollars Then it isn't making sense If you aren't moving units Then you're not worth the expense If you really want to make it You had best remember this: If it isn't penetration Then it isn't worth a kiss