Ha ha, ha ha Uh huh, uh huh So tell me, when you took the Practice Scholastic Aptitude Test, did you know the answers or did you guess? You rely on gimmicks to amuse your fans and act all urban to jack up your soundscan What's the matter with you? How come you rhyme monosylabically? Is atrophy shrinking your entire vocabulary? Your style's like garbage cans meant to be taken out on a weekly basis Ever since your first record you've been in a state of suspended animation You look like Snuffleuffagus and Astropithecus Me cray, you abacus But enough about you, let's talk about me and how single-handedly I redefined the science of radio astronomy Making Nobel prize winners question their notions of reality Oh, but I digress You always win at Sorry I always win at chess Go get some percasets Ha ha, ha ha Chorus: Careful with that mic weezy Do you really think it's that easy? Do you really think it's true? That up above they can't hear you Mmm, this is really good ice cream, do you want some of it? Oh, my bad, I didn't know you were lactose intolerant Makes you pass gas, frightens all the girls away Only friends you keep are those you pay I'm always on the ready for the wack snack attack I carry sandwiches around in a straight edge style Jansport back pack Got the gadget Q gave Bond, controls your mind, makes you jump in a pond Go quack quack and flap your arms Leaves you confused but completely unharmed Ha ha, ha ha Both you and I know the past ten years have been rather intense I'm ashamed to admit I've been fooled by the seductions of violence People walking around with ugly auras At times I'm even tempted to seek the advice of Dr. Laura But I ignore her And I take a deep breath and count to ten Ain't gonna let it get under my skin Take a deep breath and count to ten Think of all the nice places that I've been Like back when I was waging peace against the visigoths I was tutored in the ancient mysteries by a wisened philosoph Learned the polyrythyms of celestial time Waiting for the one to come and get it done And finish the rhyme Ha ha