In England once there lived a big And wonderfully clever pig To everybody it was plain That Piggy had a massive brain He worked out summs inside his head, There was no book he hadn't read, He knew what made an airplane fly, He knew why skinhead love beer and fight He knew all this, but in the end One question drove him round the bend He simply couldn't puzzle out What LIFE was really all about What was the reason for his birth? Why was he placed upon this earth? His giant brain went round and round Alas, no answer could be found Till suddenly one wonderous night All in a flash, he saw the light He jumped up like a pogo dancer And yelled "By gum, I've got the answer" "They want my bacon slice by slice To sell at a tremendous price! They want my tender juicy chops To put in all the butchers' shops!