Guy Upstairs is such a freak
For five years now I've had a leak
What does he do up there?
All day long he "sleeps all day"
Then he goes out, comes home in the most
Intoxicated way
As far as I can tell, he juggles bowling balls
But he's not good at it
He moves his furniture then at 6: 00 am
He pulls out the vaccum cleaner to suck his room
The guy downstairs is also crazy
He spent some time in an institute
It did him not much good
He's off his medication and he starts screaming
"Virgin Mary, you fucking alien!"
According to him, Jesus Christ smokes crack
And other sundrid things
But it's the man upstairs who pulls the strings
Won't let me sleep
Please, kill that man upstairs
If you ever loved me
You'll do this one thing, won't you sweetheart?
Please murder that man upstairs
If you want to be my friend
You'll have to prove you mean it
I used to think that rent control was a good idea
Until I moved in here
Now I'm the only sucker
Paying more than a hundred bucks a room
And I'm surrounded by lunatics
Who don't even need a moon
But it's the man upstairs who pulls the strings
Won't let me sleep
Please kill that man upstairs
If you ever loved me
You'll do this one thing, won't you sweetheart?
Please murder that fuck upstairs
If you want to be my friend
You'll have to prove you mean it
And there's the lady across the hall
Who always knows what's going on
And Machu Pichu down the stairs
Who's selling Crack from door to door
14B are refugees
And 14A, transvestite whores
But "you know who" is coming home
He's falling up his drunken stairs
Please kill that man upstairs
If you ever loved me
You'll do this one thing, won't you sweetheart?
Please, murder that fuck upstairs
If you want to be my friend, you'll
Help me get a good nights' sleep