Last winter blew so cold no lies
And my fire smoke would not rise
Soon as the smoke would tried to depart
It'd be froze up harder than a landlord's heart
I called up the police yes and they came around
Three days later and very brought down
Sergeant he gave me this hysterical croak says
"What do you think you have going here, some kind of joke?"
Of course I wasn't laughing
He says, "You're causing us officers so much grief
Why don't you give us some relief?
Why don't you call the fire brigade?
Or maybe why don't you try shovelling
The smoke up the chimney with a spade"
I borrowed a spade from the woman next door
And I broke up the smoke that remained on the floor
I was shovelling away
'Till the closing day singing a smoke-shovelling song
After working so hard I went out to my yard
And I looked up to my chimney so long
There was nothing to see there
Just a thousand foot high, way into the sky
Was a pillar of smoke full of song
There was an airplane stuck in it
But I didn't notice at first
It was so cunningly disguised as a dragon
Come the summer at last, though it was rainy and fast
The pillar it melted away
Now the airplane fell with a big smoky smell
And echoing around all over the town
Was the words of the smoke shovelling song
Any anyone telling a bigger story
Would have to be telling a lie
And anyone think a bigger one up
Have to be very high