I saw a guy
I saw a guy peeling a banana the other day
It's another banana joke, isn't it
'Cause you know the other one got to do with banana
I got three banana jokes by the way
This is number two, okay
I saw a guy peeling a banana on 6th avenue
And it bothered me
And I'll tell you why
Because it's the way he peeled
Why peel a banana, I hold it around here
I peel down to my hand right?
The guy holds the banana at the bottom
And he just peels the whole thing all the way down
It felt like the guy had a urinal pulling his pants all the way to his ankles
I was like dude, TMI would have been anyway now
What are you, making a smoothie on 6th avenue
What are you doing
The banana was like, hey
You don't even know how much you gonna eat
I have a bruise right here
I kinda got lost in the banana sham there
Do you wanna hear the other banana one now
Okay, so I was at the grocery store
And I needed bananas
So I go over to where the bananas are
And there a black woman at the bananas
It's gonna be okay
It's gonna be okay I swear
I understand
Why people are very scared of discussing bananas and black people in the same conversation
I understand
If I have a black friend over, I would never offer him a banana
I just thought oh I wouldn't do it
Oh you want a banana
Why do fuck do you ask me
Hey man, I'm sorry
How about apple, I'm really sorry
These are just the facts of the case alright
I was in the store looking for bananas
And there was a black woman at the bananas
And I didn't wanna go there while she's there
Because of COVID, we're all giving each other space
So I, but I do wanna be next
So I'm waiting and she's kinda taking a long time
And the longer she takes
The longer I am a white man watching a black woman choose bananas
And there's this awful thing about the world today
Because I know I'm not doing wrong
But I feel fucking bad
I feel fucking bad
So I went to the strawberries
And there was a fucking Jew at the strawberries
Here's a life line
That's the Jew, I'm not gonna do the black woman
No, you know why 'cause I'm not afraid of Jews
That's really, that's the bottom line
I'm not scared of Jews
I don't find Jews to be frightening
Unless you're in Palestine, then they're terrifying
It's very different
Over there they're like, the Jews are killing us
And here we're like, really, the Jews?
We've been slapping them around for years
Anyway, this banana's too hard
Well this banana's soft but I'm not gonna have it 'til Tuesday
So I'm gonna buy the hard one and wait
Just trying to be fair
Trying to be fair to the Jews
Lord have mercy, anyway
Don't worry I'm an old man
I'll be gone very soon