Christmas Day will not be very merry Explaining to the children will be hard Well it's Christmas Eve tonight And our beagle picked a fight With some reindeer that were grazing in our yard I let the dog outside to do his business I forgot to his leash up to the peg First he and Cupid came to blows Then he bit Rudolph on the nose And when I got there he was eyeing Prancers leg Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus He's claiming mental anguish in his case Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus And my kids won't even look me in the face I tried to throw myself on Santa's mercy I begged him but I wasn't gettin' thru I said " it's all your fault you know " He said " now how can that be so? " I said " because we got the stupid dog from you!" Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus He's claiming mental anguish in his case Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus And my kids won't even look me in the face Oh I'm gettin' sued by Santa Claus He's claiming mental anguish in his case Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus And my kids won't even look me in the face Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus Now I'm bunkin' with the beagle at his place