You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch You really are a heel You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel! You're a monster, Mr. Grinch Your heart's an empty hole Your brain is full of spiders, You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot Pole! You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch You have termites in your smile You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch Given a choice between the two of you I'd take the seasick crocodile! The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote "Stink, stank, stunk!" You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch You're the king of sinful sots Your heart's a dead tomato Splotched with moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch