Let me tell you a story of an old greasy spoon A honky tonk dive bar, a roadhouse saloon. Once a boogie 'til you puke joint forty years ago Now a rundown motel tables bolted to the floor There's a boombox on the jukebox both with out of service signs As if they'd both once worked but they've served their time A sign on the wall read 'fight once barred for life' It was busted down the middle from a rowdier night The only fried chicken left is necks and a gizzard The waitress is workin' double duty an ol' lot lizard I'd never seen gravy so thin in my life Coffee so thick you could cut it with a knife Conversations are scarce if you'd call 'em that. Grunts between gulps and chewin' the fat Beer soaked funny pages hung on the ice chest Like they once had a sense of humor but that's all that's left Tip jar is empty except a cigarette and a dime There's an old blue tick hound just watchin' the flies The jar of pickled eggs has seen better days. Only one egg left discoloured and misshaped All the smokers round the ashtray like moths to a flame. I really oughtta quit, one of 'em proclaims The cook and dishwasher are having a smoke of their own Finest grass in the county, hydroponically grown There's a shower round back, coin operated It's a just like home only more dilapidated 'Diner and lounge' the neon sign once displayed Now it reads 'die alone' as clear as day