I kiss you and i can taste the girlhood i never had I was dead for 26 years I feel so, so stupid for waiting That i am so close to giving up It's ontological fate Every transition is done too late - - - And the boys want her but pretend they don't And write her love letters concealed as threats And she stops coming to school And maybe has a quiet overdose And drops out into camming And she has a friend like her And she's broken too But even when we were assaulted, Again and again It's better to be broken together Even death is tolerable if there is truth And we're truth And i am so scared that all this possible pain Is still better than being a corpse in a closet Waiting for right moment Not for for me, for everybody else And even more scared that i did know But pretended i didn't A safe and slow rot Seems good enough Right up to the moment of birth I wish i always were Me Because Hell is fine if i am woman there too And hell is my truth