Another year without you here and the Leaves still fall like they always do. Days roll by, no one mentions suicide, Poor mental health still shrouded in taboo, So I still mention you. You're not some bitter word I never want to say. I lay awake trying to place blame but I can't blame what doesn't have a cause. I can't hate you for it, but I can't come to terms with what you did. Remembering the unexpected pause when I got the call. You were always more than 1 of 84. Still I feel the sorrow as I'm walking past your House and I can't hear the summer softly whisper. When will there be an end to sleepless nights staring at the walls Again, 'til they start closing in, When I've buried too many better men than me? So I pull myself together, Repeat things will get better and then Pray for the strength to finally say " Tomorrow's another day". (But) I'm barely holding on and morning brings with it no closure and Leaves me feeling more emotionally in debt to Memories of pictures paid in time already spent.