I woke up one morning, and I got out my gun
And we headed up nort on Highway 141!
It was time for breakfast – we'd been driving a while
Hit the Quik Mart in Lena for a case of Old Style!
Well, we finally got to Crivitz at eleven o'clock
With hopes of killing furry critters, and some grouse, and woodcock!
We drenched ourselves in skeeter spray: it was 100% Deet
Yah! We're lucky that we stopped at the Farm and Fleet!
Now we're both ready, the bugs won't be so harsh
We set out for some woodcock, tromping through the marsh
About 20 minutes later we heard a little sound
And 3 or 4 woodcock flew off of the ground
I aimed the Winchester double barrel over and under
And blew off two shots? Guy, they rang out like thunder!
But I used slugs instead of birdshot. Yah, that wasn't so smart
I hit two of them woodcock and ripped them both apart
I found a beak and two feathers - no problem with my aim
Better load with birdshot, yah, and find some other game!
We kicked up some grouse and they took to the sky
When they hit the clearing, those grouse were going to die!
We were about to take a shot before they flew too far
Then up came a warden from the DNR
He said I need to see a license, you can't run around here
And what's the deal with all the empty cans of Old Style beer?
So we gave him our papers, we ain't doing no harm
We got permission to hunt the woods behind the VanderVelden farm!
He said All right you guys can hunt again, everything's OK
But we said No it's not, cause all the grouse flew away!
Well it's time to move on so we headed up the hill
Maybe we can find a fuzzy animal to kill!
I kicked a brush pile and out shot a rabbit
And we fired both barrels at the hare out of habit
I sprayed him full of shot and laid him out on the rocks
And my gun scared the hell out of a red-tailed fox
The fox darted past between me and the rabbit
And as he ran by he sure enough went and grabbed it
I couldn't shoot the varmint, didn't reload my gun
So we hopped back in the pickup, we weren't having any fun
Just out of Beaver on the county trunk
We stopped in the bar and got rip-snorting drunk
When we stumbled out the tavern with a beer in our fist
It was five hours later, oh the wife will be pissed!
To avoid the law, we used County Truck B
We won't get no T – I – C – K – E – T!
But we shouldn't have been driving after 10 or 20 beer
Cause we flew off of the road and ran smack into a deer!
It caused eleven-hundred dollars in damage to his truck
But it cost a little more for that mutilated buck!
We got skunked on the hunt but were happy all the same
We went hunting up in Crivitz and came home with some game!