I'm sick but I already told you that's once
That blood you saw last time wasn't fake it's real I do my own stunts
That gun had bullets I just got lucky I play Russian roulette for fun
That knife was trash I got it replaced it didn't cut deep it was too blunt
That girls still here she's sucking my dick
I might of been wrong she may be the one
We're not in love but in 2021 I'm going to let her have my son
So we can post and fake happy while our real lives come undone
And stay home and watch re-runs
But I don't want your sympathy
Fuck your help!
Everyone's and expert on everyone else except their fucking selves
Last time that I made a song I left a lot of shit on that shelf
'Cause I know you're to weak to hear the truth or care about how I felt
And oh Hi comment section!
Did you know your words describe you
And not me and bounce back
'Cause in life we project our insecurities on people we wish we could be
While blinded by the fact that we're our own biggest and worst enemies
Yeah
You don't know me, you knew me
You thought JOKER was a joke that shits my life this ain't no movie
You torment me and you abuse me
Haunt me, chase me and amuse me
I'm at war inside my mind my OPS are black they hide at night
Like I'm playing Call of Duty
I'm depressed but cancel culture causes me to say that loosely
Why do you Judge if your not JUDY
You ain't my friend you're dead to me
After what you've done I feel like uzi
I'm done dealing with these Groupies
When they see me they sea food I feel like sushi
Oh it's funny right 'cause it's not happening to you
I wear a size 13 men's
There's no damn way you could walk in my shoes
Take this pain and do what I do
While making songs that people use
To get through shit I can't get through
While they laugh, hate, destroy, and constantly ridicule
You guys are pitiful, you take my words and you twist them
That's why I don't want to do interviews
I told my mom I was suicidal
And she cried and then screamed what the he'll has got into you
I don't know mom, maybe those people who laugh, hate, spin the truth
And pray you fail and once you do- ha ha ha ha ha
They start kicking you
Fuck, they tried to put try me in a hospital bed
Diagnose me and stuff me with meds
All it ever did was fuck up my head
They Anti depress you
Until you're depressed again
And then you depend on the pills
That made you independent
What a shame
I'm stuck in a cycle
I'm the hero, villain, traitor and somebody else's idol
I make songs about my broken heart and about Bible
If you feel depressed or wanna kill yourself I'm not liable
Let me clarify and get this straight
I make songs that no one else can make
That millions love 'cause they relate
Then get half the recognition but twice the hate
Then Reinvest and do it all again
At a quicker speed than anyone driving in my lane
Then I smile and wave, work and slave, talk to my fans everyday
While you troll and only take breaks to take a shit or masturbate
Then claim my life's a piece of cake
Like you could somehow do it even though
We know you wouldn't 'cause you're to God damn afraid
Don't even join my circus this time I'm not in the mood
Go listen to that mainstream music
Or whatever you friends think is cool
I'll sit here and play the fool, while you drool
And drown inside my tears that fill, Olympic pools
Even Michael Phelps couldn't endure, Furthermore
I'm tired of drinking and waking up on the floor
Tired of living a life I cannot afford
Tired of living my life for people who never saw me
As equal who hate me and just try to ignore
No more, it's war, I'm evening this score
Killing everyone that walks through that doors
And tells me I need wings to soar
So let me take the knife the gun and stop pointing them at myself
I've hurt enough it's time for you to feel it along everyone else
Society needs sobriety
We put people down for notoriety
Love in public but destroy them privately
Adding creating anxiety
Then we want love and don't get it oh the irony
This was a poem I wrote in my diary
Fighting demons deep inside of me
I feel alone yet I'm constantly fighting for privacy seeking truth
While everyone I know lies to me
It's ironic 'cause people who knew me the best didn't support me
Until I finally made it now they wanna fake it and act like they love me
When I know they don't even like me
You ain't slick
I remember the day dude fucked my bitch
I remember rejection after rejection
And going home wanting to slit my wrists
I remember that coach who said I wasn't shit
Then took my fucking scholarship
And all those kids who used to bully me because I didn't fit in
How does it feel?
When you see me now
They say if you're alone and fall it doesn't make a sound
What goes up must come down
Unless, you get a knife and cut a smile so you never frown