My friend Auto sitting next to me She piped up, "I used to live in these parts I used to hang out down at the mall I'd lean against the wall and smoke cigarettes And watch all the pretty girls walk by But this one girl in particular She caught my eye She was a vision out of a magazine She was like nothing I had ever seen before She was fast and furious She was tough and mean She wasn't like the other girls I knew She was the queen of the five-finger discount She could lift anything from any store And I swore that I would make her mine Oh Andy, steal me away Oh Andy, steal my away Well, Andy had the stickiest fingers in town She was mighty handy with her hands She dropped out of high school a while back But she was a class-act kleptomaniac I offered her a cigarette She declined and pulled out her own She said, "Baby, I don't need nothing from you Except maybe a partner in crime" Oh Andy, steal me away Oh Andy, steal me away She was Thelma and I was Louise But we got away in every getaway scene She was Bonnie and I was Clyde She was my crooked valentine and our love never died She'd hook her thumbs in the hip pockets of my Favourite faded 501's I'd kiss her on the lips for good luck On those hot, summer parking lot nights She'd pick the store and pick up the goods I'd stand inside and be the lookout guy We'd jump the turnstile and start running We'd keep running till we were out of sight