In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this Goddamn town. We moved to town- The Mrs. and me To settle down On a quiet street. We had tall trees, Butterflies, bumblebees. This town has everything you need. So we set up house We planted seeds. When they came up, We pulled the weeds. There's a church on every street Birkenstocks for your feet- This town has everything you need. In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this Goddamn town. They have pitchforks at the park There's a curfew when it's dark- This town has everything you need. They have a school patrolled by rats They won't put up with this or that. They stamp out little boys When they make too much noise- This town has everything you need. In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this town everything is wonderful In this Goddamn town.