The first sin that once told Was to my parents at ten years old I stole somethin' I'll admit it But not to priests or crucifixes Me and my best friend Chris Built our alibis from bricks And when we were questioned we just read our scripts "I didn't do it" The first crime I did commit Was mischief night with my friend Chris We packed our bags with toilet paper, Bars of soap, and egg containers And we targeted everyone who ever seemed to do us wrong Oh how the time turns on And maybe Einstein can express The formulaic mysteries of time But I've lost the time And maybe Kafka was a writer But I've been living like my name is Samsa The first time I got my fix Was with my brother and my friend Chris Stole my mothers Smirnoff vodka Mixed it with some cans of Fresca And we learned how our parents lived We found that we were good at it Meet me at the bottom or in between And maybe Einstein can express The formulaic mysteries of time By I've lost the time And maybe Kafka was a writer But I've been living like my name is Samsa See you in hell I'll see ya when I see ya