I once was a happy man of sound and stable mind
Then my neighbor bought a dog
He put a ribbon on it's head to make it cute
But it still looked like a Chihuahua
He had me over to watch it sit and beg
It bit my knee and made love to my leg
Now it barks all the night and all of the day
Whenever it's not peeing on my lawn
I didn't get to sleep last night 'till very late
The stupid dog barked and grrrrred
I got up late for work and ran to catch the bus
But I slipped on a turd
I was certain, it wasn't one of mine
That that dog had crossed over the line
I wanted to exterminate it and all it's kind
From my lovely little suburb
I'm gonna kill the dog next door, ain't gonna bark any more
'Cause this is Judgment Day and the little runt has got to pay
No more turds on my lawn, that stupid mutt will soon be gone
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that dog
I see the little monster in my garden
So I grab and axe and off I go
And I try my best to get it
All I do is sever my big toe
My neighbor comes outside to calm me
He says his dog and me should just be friends
He puts his little pet in my forgiving hands
Then it starts to bite so I strangle it with all my might
Oh oh oh oh ooh
I'm gonna kill the dog next door, ain't gonna bite any more
'Cause this is Judgment Day and the little runt has got to pay
No more turds on my lawn, that stupid mutt will soon be gone
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that dog
Now that stupid mutt's in doggy heaven
I strangled it to death and now I'm free
But my trouble ain't quite over
My neighbor called the cops on me
I end up at the police station
Where I am told that I must pay
A three-hundred dollar fine
Wow, what a good value I think I'll kill my neighbor too
Oh oh oh oh ooh
I'm gonna kill the guy next door, won't call the cops anymore
I never liked him anyway, three hundred isn't much to pay
There are turds on my lawn
They must be his, his dog is gone
Gonna kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill
Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill that guy