Hey kid, why the long face Is it cause Santa Claus is Flying right on over your place You've been a bad kid all year So quit your snivellin' sucker And wipe up them tears You don't deserve a damn thing You're not even cute and your attitude stinks It must suck to be you Nobody likes you so what can you do You think you got problems kid, You think you got strife? But come each December do you fear for your life? I'm your turkey baby, so your troubles are small I'm stuffed on your table, I'm a tasty butterball I've got the Christmas turkey blues If you got your necked ripped out then you'd have them too I've got the Christmas turkey blues You chase me and waste and baste me And taste me and drown me in gravy too You sir, you look like heck Didn't you get your Christmas bonus cheque Or maybe your woman left you Ripped your heart right out of your chest and spat on it too Is that why you're reeking of gin You look disheveled and there's drool on your chin You thought that this love would laugh But she said Merry Christmas baby and she booted your ass Well that's tough for you mister, too bad about your ordeal How about getting stuffed in the wintertime, see how you fee I don't get to yank no bones or make me a wish It won't be long til I'm just some scraps on a dish I've got the Christmas turkey blues If your butt was stuffed and roasted then you'd have then too I've got the Christmas turkey blues You chase me and waste and baste me And taste me and drown me in gravy too (*spoken*) Let's take a walk