Ohhhh... Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass 'Cause you've always been a rotten little brat Reindeer coming and they're gonna bite your wreath They're gonna chew your welcome mat Swallow your kitty cat Reindeer coming and they're gonna eat your begonias 'Cause Santa hasn't fed them in a month Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass 'Cause he's sick of shoveling snow and reindeer poo Elves are coming and they're gonna steal your turkey Wreck your TV Burn down your Christmas tree Elves are coming and they're gonna trash your home 'Cause they ain't got nothing else to do Santa's loaded with attitude He's loud and drunk and smelly and rude His workshop's been closed by an auditor And Mrs. Claus ran off with her chiropractor. Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass He's gonna kick your ass Santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass 'Cause he's had a really crappy year Ow, my bum hurts...