I am not American, Though I live in North America Which is part of the Americas Which should make me an American Geographically Canadians, Are certainly Americans As are Venezuelans, But not Hawaiians They're out in the middle of the Ocean Just like the U.S. Virgin Islands, They really shouldn't say they are Americans, Or even virgins How could two whole continents, Lose their name to one constituent? Where were we when the U.S. went, And took the word American away? But to be fair to them, Their other name options, Like U.S.A.ers or United Statesians, Were pretty bad Still I want to be as American, As the French are European, Or those in Antarctica are Antarctican Even if they're just penguins That leaves us Canadians as Northern North American, But Alaska's Norther curse them We're surrounded by Americans Americans, Americans! I just called those U.S.A.ers Americans A name meant for two continents not just them For if I said I was American, People would probably think I came from Maine Still I think I have a plan, Let's become Antarctican, And join up with the penguins For just like them, we're not American!