Tzeitl! Tzeitl, darling Guess who I just saw? Your sister Chava, with that Fyedka! And it's not the first time I've seen them together You saw Chava with Fyedka? Would I make it up? Ugh! Oh, and Tzeitl, I happened to be at the post office today And the postman told me that he had a letter there For your sister, Hodel Wonderful! I'll go get it I got it It's from her intended, Perchik Oh, Hodel will be so happy, she's been waiting— It's open It happened to be open! Lyvka! I have such news Remember Perchik? That crazy student? Remember at the wedding? When Tzeitl married Motel And Perchik started dancing With Tevye's daughter Hodel Well, I just learned that Perchik's been arrested in Kiev! No! Yes! Sheindl! Sheindl! Wait 'til I tell you! Remember Perchik? That crazy student? Remember at the wedding? He danced with Tevye's Hodel Well, I just heard that Hodel's been arrested in Kiev! No! Terrible, terrible Yrla! Rabbi! Rabbi! Do you remember Perchik? (Remember Perchik) That student from Kiev (With all his strange ideas) Remember how he acted (Remember Tzeitl's wedding) When Tzeitl married Motel Well I just heard (Where Tevye danced with Golde) Hodel's been arrested (Well I just heard) For dancing at the wedding! (That Tevye's been arrested!) And Tevye's gone to Kiev! (And Golde's gone to Kiev!) What?! Listen everybody, terrible news! Terrible! Remember Perchik? (Yes) Who started all the trouble (So?) Well I just heard— From someone who should know! (What?) That Golde's been arrested And Hodel's gone to Kiev Motel studies dancing And Tevye's acting strange Shprintze has the measles Bielke has the mumps And that's what comes from men and women dancing!