Now, just what do you expect after 25 years?
Come on in, come on in, make yourself at home
Will I get used to this?
Always having dreams of where I die
Waking panicked half alive
Broken bones in my fingers
Crawling out of bed just to survive
Too exhausted, cannot fight
Don't wanna be this, don't wanna be that
Yeah, this life is fucking mine, get back and let me decide
Feels like I'm just cursed in this body
Hold a second, give me five, can I fucking feel alive?
Because I don't understand this, I don't understand this
I think the pressure's getting through to me
I think I'm stuck in a place between
I'm sick of begging fucking on my knees
'Cause I would never wish this, would never wish this
On fucking anyone who fucking breathes
You'll live a life only filled with deceit
Now paranoid, my only enemy is me
Though nothing feels real online
I live there all the fuckin' time
If only they really knew me
I'd hate to really know me
Though nothing feels real online
I live there all the fuckin' time
If only they really knew me
I'd hate to really know me
But it's as real as everywhere else
But it's as real as everywhere else
I know I ain't the same motherfucker that I used to be
Now it's white wine sippin' just to put myself to sleep
Fuck, if you saw, memories, you'd be under deep
Thankful I'm alive, but it hurts, fuck, I cannot breathe
I am breaking, someone save me
Riv and Seph, got my back, I'ma make it
I can shake this feeling of abasement
Knowing I got homies I can trust, I'ma make it
Because I don't understand this, I don't understand this
I think the pressure's getting through to me
I think I'm stuck in a place between
I'm sick of begging fucking on my knees
'Cause I would never wish this, would never wish this
On fucking anyone who fucking breathes
You'll live a life only filled with deceit
Now paranoid, my only enemy is me
Because I don't understand this, I don't understand this
I think the pressure's getting through to me
I think I'm stuck in a place between
I'm sick of begging fucking on my knees
'Cause I would never wish this, would never wish this
On fucking anyone who fucking breathes
You'll live a life only filled with deceit
Now paranoid, my only enemy is me