She don't like her eggs all runny She thinks crossin' her legs is funny She looks down her nose at money She gets it on like the Easter Bunny She's my baby, I'm her honey I'm never gonna let her go He ain't got laid in a month of Sundays I caught him once and he was sniffin' my undies He ain't too sharp, but he gets things done Drinks his beer like it's oxygen He's my baby and I'm his honey I'm never gonna let him go In spite of ourselves, we'll end up a-sittin' on a rainbow Against all odds, honey, we're the big door prize We're gonna spite our noses right off of our faces There won't be nothin' but big old hearts dancin' in our eyes She thinks all my jokes are corny Convict movies make her horny She likes ketchup on her scrambled eggs Swears like a sailor when she shaves her legs She takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin' I'm never gonna let her go He's got more balls than a big brass monkey He's a whacked-out weirdo and a lovebug junkie Sly as a fox and crazy as a loon Payday comes and he's howlin' at the moon He's my baby, I don't mean maybe Never gonna let him go In spite of ourselves, we'll end up a-sittin' on a rainbow Against all odds, honey, we're the big door prize We're gonna spite our noses right off of our faces There won't be nothin' but big old hearts dancin' in our eyes In spite of ourselves, we'll end up a-sittin' on a rainbow Against all odds, honey, we're the big door prize We're gonna spite our noses right off of our faces There won't be nothin' but big old hearts dancin' in our eyes In spite of ourselves