She's a movie star arrangement Got a touch of Bergman to her face She wears suits and buys him flowers Smokes his cigarettes and bakes him cakes He says uh oh i love you But i'm not sure i trust you You seem strange to me She's got green eyes and she's lovely Reminds me of the 'it' girl with her lips Got an automatic license Reads all Dostoievsky's household tips He says uh oh i love you But i'm not sure i trust you You seem strange to me How come everyone suspects her Attach her to a lie detector Watch a thousand housewives fizz and burn And every time she answers yes The needles on his polygraph test Just go round in circles like his brain She's got long hair but she's ugly Got a touch of Einstein to her brain She wears fat clothes but she's cunning People say she's easy all the same He says uh oh i love you But i'm not sure i trust you You seem strange to me It took a thousand cliches just to scold her Took a man from Stepford and a tape recorder Got his ego broken, so crestfallen You made a start, you made us laugh Stop it. you're a grown man baby It's just that your head's no good