Germ meets bat Bat meets pig Pig meets plate Plate meets human And human lips And fingertips Then humans kiss Now human gets sick With a new virus That's never existed before So leave your vaccines at the doors And stock up on the beans in your drawers This is hardcore (This is hardcore) (Cough cough) Now what's gonna happen to you (Cough cough) Stay off the buses and stay off the tube (Cough cough) Don't worry the government knows just what to do (Cough cough) Like SARS, Influenza, Black Death, and Swine Flu? Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Watch out! Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Watch out! The NHS is well-prepared to deal with an outbreak of this kind And is already putting measures in place Is this a dream? I can't believe what I'm seeing The shops are swept clean And every single musician is doing a live-stream You best-a-believe I turned the heating on Now I think I've got a fever Guess that's two weeks on my sofa Guess I'm a loner (Cough cough) Might build an online persona (Cough cough) Or get in shape and do some yoga (Cough cough) All while preventing pneumonia (Cough cough) Thanks Corona Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Watch out! Pandemic Pandemic Pandemic Watch out! He's a pig he's a piggy he's a piglet Yeah Boris Johnson likes big business If I catch him walkin round Brixton I'll cut his fingers off right right at the signet