Long ago, in times of war
Men spoke of an artifact
Built by gods from worlds unknown
And wielded by kings
With the blaster in my hands
Lord Zargothrax would surely yield
Goblin armies run away in fear
(We must find it here)
For the kingdom of Space Dundee
For the powerful weapon that I seek
In the ashes of nuclear war
Remember the things we are fighting for
For the land where the dragon flies
Far across the enchanted sapphire sky
I've seen it inside of my dreams
The vorpal laserblaster of Pittenweem
♪
Weapon borne of mystic times
A fragment of destiny
Charged with light from an ancient star
And forged from pure steel
He who wields dark matter cannon
Becomes one with the power
I must quest far and wide until it is mine
I'll quest for all time
For the kingdom of Space Dundee
For the powerful weapon that I seek
In the ashes of nuclear war
Remember the things we are fighting for
For the land where the dragon flies
Far across the enchanted sapphire sky
I've seen it inside of my dreams
The vorpal laserblaster of Pittenweem
♪
Ride, mighty warriors
Across the plains of East Kilbride
Pass the icy chasms
To the mountains of Strathclyde
There, inside a citadel
Where a robot guards the way
You will find the blaster
To smite your foes this day
♪
For the kingdom of Space Dundee
For the powerful weapon that I seek
In the ashes of nuclear war
The tales of our glory will live evermore
Now the chest is before my eyes
But inside there is emptiness and lies
By the wizard I've been deceived
The vorpal laserblaster of Pittenweem
Pathetic mortal scum
Your quest was in vain, and your realm is doomed
For the vorpal laserblaster of Pittenweem
Is now in the hands of the immortal Zargothrax