My imperfections comprise my self-image
If there's hope for redemption, I can't really tell
If I can't love myself, then how could anyone else?
The devil on my shoulder has his hands clutched around my throat
Telling my apprehension to keep me from staying afloat
To emphasize on those problems with myself I don't want to face
To keep on adding to the list of things that I want to efface
They say "get over it
The skies will clear,"
But the days have seemed overcast
For what seems like years
I can't assert
I can't prove my worth
I can't think for myself
I don't have any nerve
I can only pray that you'll stay
And pretend it's okay
Inveterate
Asphyxiated with no failsafe
Self-actualize?
Bleed reason into my sight?
I have such little time
For I am human, I am finite
But if innocence is feigned
And these sentiments won't be changed
I won't put up a fight
It's just one more thing to keep me up at night
When I'm awake, nothing feels quite right
Too attached to everyone in sight
And it's all the same at night
For there's no solace in sleep
Just visions I don't want to keep
Purge these self-abhorrent tendencies
Please make me what you want to see
They say "get over it
The skies will clear,"
But the days have seemed overcast
For what seems like years
I keep telling myself I'm not depressed
Just under the weather
Don't expose vulnerability
Just pull it together
God, I want to make you proud
But it's been two decades of only letting you down
It's getting harder to keep this gun from my mouth
I wait for the sun to come out
Oh, will it ever come out?
Will it ever come out?
Will it ever come out?