Set fire to your hair
Poke a stick at a grizzly bear
Eat medicine that's out of date
Use your private parts as piranha bait
Dumb ways to die
So many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to die-ie-ie
So many dumb ways to die
Get your toast out with a fork
Do your own electrical work
Teach yourself how to fly
Eat a two week old unrefrigerated pie
Dumb ways to die
So many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to die-ie-ie
So many dumb ways to die
Invite a psycho-killer inside
Scratch your drug dealer's brand new ride
Take your helmet off in outer space
Use your clothes dryer as a hiding place
Dumb ways to die
So many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to die-ie-ie
So many dumb ways to die
Keep a rattlesnake as pet
Sell both the kidneys on the internet
Eat a tube of superglue
"I wonder what's this red button do?"
Dumb ways to die
So many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to die-ie-ie
So many dumb ways to die
Dress up like a moose during hunting season
Disturb a nest of wasps for no good reason
Stand on the edge of a train station platform
Drive around the boom gates at a level crossing
Run across the tracks between the platforms
They may not rhyme but they're quite possibly
The dumbest ways to die
The dumbest ways to die
The dumbest ways to die-ie-ie-ie
So many dumb
So many dumb ways to die