Thanks for coming
Thanks for being here
We got a lot to cover and not much time
Now is a fine place to start
But before we do
Can I ask you all to turn off your phones?
Turn them off
That's right, turn them off
And when you hear what I say
You'll want to throw out your own junk anyway
"Junk!" "Junk?" "Junk junk junk junk!" "Junk!"
He called my smartphone junk!
A quote
Popular Mechanics, 1949
"Computers in the future may perhaps
Weigh only one and a half tons"
(*laughs*)
You'll recall I once said
"Never trust a computer you can't lift"
But now, today, I say
"Never trust one you can't fit in your pocket"
And here you have it, right here, right now
Nestled in my pocket
Cradled in my hand
Today
Right now
Only one device
Does it all
In one hand
All you need
One device
Does it all
In one hand
All you need
(One device) Communication
(Does it all) Entertainment
(In one hand) Information
(All you need) Illumination
(One device) Connections, interaction
(Does it all) Navigation, communication
(In one hand) Inspiration, comprehension
(All you need) Not to mention communication
One device
Does it all
In one hand
Tap, get the news
Tap, set a date
Tap, book a flight
Tap, stay in touch
Tap, stay in shape
Tap, talk to friends
Tap, stalk celebs
Tap, map a route
Tap, pay a bill
Tap, plan a day
Tap, clear a day
Tap, try an app
Tap, scrap the app
Hear some Bach, hear The Boss, hear your boss
Type type type type type type type swipe
Cheer the game
Play a game
Send a card
Mend a heart
Buy a tie
Learn some Thai
Order Thai
Miss your kids, miss your wife, miss your home, miss your life
Tap
Make up with your girlfriend
Tap
Break up with your girlfriend
Tap
Break up with your parents
Zap
Take up with a puppy
Snap
Your cute new puppy
Snap
Your cute new car
Your cute new puppy in your cute new car
Tap
Being driven by the pope
(*laughter*)
All with one device (Boom or bust?)
Does it all (Hope or hype?)
In one hand (Hot or not?)
All you need (State of the art or art of the sale?)
Only one device (Hit or miss?) (Today it was revealed)
Does it all (Score or snore?) (Our people have confirmed)
In one hand (Wow or meh?) (Another product launch)
All you need (May spell a trend?) (Excitement running high)
Information (May spell the end?) (The future has arrived)
Education (Creating quite a buzz)
Entertainment (A revolution in)
Communication
All you need (one device does it all)
To review (in one hand, all you need)
To relive (one device does it all)
To control (in one hand)
Today it was revealed
Our people have confirmed
Another product launch
Excitement running high
The future has arrived
Historical event
A revolution in
Creating quite a buzz
Today it was revealed
Our people have confirmed
Another product launch
Excitement running high
The future has arrived
Creating quite a buzz
Our people have confirmed
Another product launch
It's all you need in one hand
In your pocket, everything
All you need, all you need
In your pocket, everything
(One device) In one hand
(Everything) All you need
(To relive) To control
(All of those) Messy moments
(Precious moments) In your life
(In your life) All of those
(Glorious) Chaotic moments
(Beautiful moments in your life)
One, one device
One, one, one device
All you need to revive, review, relive, renew
Control (One device)
(All you need to revive, review, relive, renew)
Control (I need it)
You need it (I need it)
You must have it now!
To capture and control all those mad and messy moments in your life