I'm in a group chat
With 21 god damn people
I wish I was exaggerating, but I'm not
My phone crashes 37 times a day
But it's nice to have friends
Sometimes it's nice to be left on read
(Wait, no it's not)
I think I'm taking things too personally
When did I get so sensitive?
I don't think I have the energy to make it out of my bed today
It's not even a bed
I've been sleeping on an air mattress with a hole
For almost three months
And sometimes when I can't sleep
I can feel the space I've put between
The only people I'd risk anything for
But if they'd whisper at my door
I'd probably hide under the sheets
I work a job where
I swear to god they're setting a timer when I take a bathroom break
And I'm barely scraping minimum wage and the
Things they have the audacity to ask of me
Better catch up with them eventually
Oh, I'm begging please
Let it catch them eventually
It's my last night in the city that taught me I'm an extrovert
And here I am spending it alone
Laying on a carpet floor, staring at a wall
Listing off all of the places I would rather be
And it's my fault
I did this to myself
I crawled into a hole for a six months
Then came creeping back out
Expecting everything to be the same
And I dug this pit
And you enabled it
So I guess I'll
I'll disappear again, 200 miles West this time
I'll get a job and make some fake friends and I'll be
Fine
Just like the last time
Just like the last time
Arm's length, arm's length this time
Arm's length
It's safer that way