For six and sixty years I worked like a slave
Night after day all this time in my cave
There was dust in my hairs, and frost in my bones
I was tired of working on the philosophal stone
Was frozen and thirsty, but didn't feel like tea
Was so sick and tired of my laboratory
So I went to the pub took a picher of cider
And a drop of strange rum with a viper on board
A picher of Cider
And a pint of G
Near the fireplace with my glass of black beer
I felt better and I felt asleep in my chair
All of a sudden, an old man came in
T'was a chum that I hadn't see for eighty years
We spoke of the past and his family
We freshened our mem'ry with glasses of whisky
I stood up and went out see how the wolrd changed
Drank a strong Irish coffee to give me more strength
A pitcher of cider
Many glasses of whisky
A strong Irish coffee
And a pint of G
The ground seemed to move up and down as I walked
I found a new tavern behind the docks
Grabbed an old silver nugget, hidden in my sock
I enjoyed all the sorts of wine they had in stock
As I tried to go home, staggering in the streets
The wind blew me a ticket of lottery at my feet
Didn't bother to check whether it was a winner
I got back to the pub to celebrate with Champagne
A pitcher of cider
Many glasses of whisky
A strong Irish coffee
All sorts of wine
A bottle of Champagne
And a pint of G
After five jugs of ale and barrels of brandy
All the guys in the pub sang off key except me
Sat alone on the floor, was desperate and drunk
Turning lead into gold will never be my fate
BUT IF MY ticket is winner, I'll become producer
Of a fabulous rock band that'll make me much richer
Got out of the pub, toward the well I walked
Splashed my face with cold water before starting to work
A pitcher of cider
Many glasses of whisky
A strong Irish coffee
All sorts of wine
A bottle of Champagne
Five jugs of ale
Brandy from Hell
Cold water in my face
And a pint of...