"Bats join the witches
They fly across the moon
Organs blare and raise your hair
Shrieking evil doom
Cats crawl into pumpkins
They're in for quite a scare
Because they did not know
That a ghost was living there
Spoil the fun of Halloween"
I love the leathered touch
Of the good book that I clutch
Between god-fearing trembling hands
I'm sworn to scour this Christian land
Of commies, queers and heathen scum
Jews and blacks, and lesbians
They signed in blood, the Devil's contract
And partake in sinful acts, because...
I hate Halloween
Makes me want to scream
Through my window I often stare
At all the evil in the world out there
I'm the judge and jury of other's lives
With a glare of sharpened knives
Paranoia of the pagan rite
And evil jack-o-lanterns all alight
Brainwashed kids, in masquerade
The Devil leads this black parade
I hate Halloween
The damned souls blaspheme
And my bell it keeps on ringing
And the kids they keep on singing
That damned trick or treating song
Shut up! Shut up! Shut the fuck up!
And now my head is really spinning
And my stomach it feels so sickening
But I've got something for them in store
When they come knocking at my front door
Like the witches cat
My mind just fades to black
Hand reaches for the knife
Gonna carve em' like they're lantern-jacks
I'll teach those brats a lesson
For incessant doorbell toll
Envision children writhing
In plastic costumes dripping with gore
This will be the last time
I get ding-dong ditched
But as I swing open the door
There stands a slimy witch