I don't wanna go to school
I don't wanna follow rules
I don't wanna go to work
Everyone alive's a jerk
I don't wanna make new friends
I just wanna play pretend
Put my breakfast in a bowl
There it is, my heart and soul
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I don't wanna pay my rent
I don't wanna represent
Ideals of humanity
I'm giving up my thumbs for lent
Wish I could forget to read
Never caring where I've peed
Never heard of greenhouse gas
Turn around, I'll sniff your ass
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I don't wanna go to school
I don't wanna follow rules
I don't wanna go to work
Everyone alive's a jerk
I don't wanna make new friends
I just wanna play pretend
Put my breakfast in a bowl
There it is, my heart and soul
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog
I just wanna be a professional dog